Hello world, me again.
 Kinda had my head up my arse recently, been avoiding some recovery and now when it's painful i do something about it. Still in move on 3rd stage house after 361 days residential rehab, which saved my life and gave me a better understanding of the addicted mind. it's weird tho because now i'm bacoming aware of my complete dissociation over certain issues! Mainely childabuse and how that still affects my judgement in situations. For instance, it's coming up to mothers day so i had a cunning plan to send my adopted, abusive, mother a wreath? To me thats normal but to others it aint. Letting go when noone takes responsibility is fekin hard. But therapist said that maybe it aint such a good day for adopted mum, she adopted three kids, abused all in some form or another, we all have kids and noone will be sending her mothers day card? ? !! i never thought of it that way, so hopefully at least once a year - poss crimbo and birthday to?, her actions haunt her like they do for me daily!
 But on the flip side of my life at least this weekend i have service to do for recovery, also after meeting on sunday abit of fellowship food at bricklane as well, maybe a mens meeting to so i can once more off load this stuff, cos thats what people in recovery have taught me, - me teachable? when did that happen?, so others will keep my thoughts and actions away from dark vengeful actions?